WED OCTOBER 25

I woke up at around 5:30am. I opened my eyes and saw Scott in the chair across from the bed. He opened his eyes and saw I was awake. He got up and came to the bed. He kissed me on the forehead and said, How do you feel? I said pretty good actually. I just have to pee really bad. He said, I will get the nurse. Just before he pushed the nurses button he notice a bag hanging on the bed. He showed it to me and said, They have you all fixed up. All you have to do is pee. I said, I don’t know. He said, give it a try. I was having trouble holding it so I did just that. Scott saw the pee going into the bag and said, There, doesn’t that feel better. It did feel better and to my surprise I peed in the bag. Scott said the doctor should be here soon. It is almost 6am. He said, I am so sorry I left you at the table yesterday. I said, it is fine. He said, if I hadn’t left you, you might not have ended up here. Conner and I have never got along and I let him get to me. I will not let it happen again. When the doctor did come in she looked at my chart. She said, everything looks good. I talked to Mom and Conner. From what they said I think you had an anxiety attack. Do you think you can eat breakfast? I wasn’t hungry but said, yes. I will give it a try. She said, good. I am sending a psychiatrist by to talk to you and tomorrow we will see if you can go home. I said, thankyou. The doctor turned to Scott and said, Carlson is looking for you. Scott said, thankyou. I will go talk to him. The doctor left and Scott said he was going to go see what was up with Carlson and he would be right back. When Scott got to Carlson’s office, Carlson said, come on in. He said, we have a shortage of man power right now. So I am moving you down stairs to guard Serena, her mom and that other guy. Scott said, she is the one who stole my book. Carlson said, I know. Just don’t talk to her. Show up there tomorrow at 8am. Scott said, don’t you have anything else. Carlson said, no and this is where I need you. Conner did this, didn’t he? Carlson said, no. Scott said, ok. Anything else. Carlson said, No. Scott went back to Angel’s room. They hadn’t brought breakfast yet. He called the kitchen and asked if they could send his breakfast with Angel’s. They said, there would not be a problem. When breakfast came he helped me sit up in bed and opened things up for me to get me started. He pulled his chair closer to my bed and we had breakfast. Breakfast was good and while I was eating I was thinking. I wonder if Conner would like Serena? She does need a husband. The rest of the day was sleep and eat. I was sleeping good and was eating pretty good. At bed time Scott didn’t want to go. He asked the nurse if he could stay and she said a little longer. He promised me when I fell asleep he would go back to his room and get some sleep. He told me Carlson was moving him down stairs. I said, he would be fine and he could come see me when he had a chance.

THURSDAY OCTOBER 26 When I woke up Scott was sitting in the chair. I said, Did you sleep in that chair all night? Scott said, No I just got here. He was looking at his phone. He got up came over and gave me a big kiss. He then started a song on his phone. He said I have to be down stairs at 8am but we might be able to have breakfast together. The song on his phone started. It was I’m Gonna Be(500 miles) by The Proclaimers. He started singing along to me. Scott sang, When I wake up, well I know I’m gonna be the man who wakes up next to you. I couldn’t help but smile really big. He was making be really happy and I was feeling really good. When he finished singing he said, I love you. We heard a noise and the doctor was in the door way. She said, How are you two love birds this morning? I said, great. She came toward the bed and said, I looked at your blood test and everything is looking good. If you are looking good tomorrow we will send you home if we get the ok from Dr. Walton. How was your meeting with Dr. Walton? I said, It was good. He is coming back later today. The doctor said, If you go home tomorrow you will have to come over everyday and see him until he says other wise. We don’t want you back into this hospital again unless it is the deliver. I said, that will be fine. He is easy to talk to. The doctor said, Ok then. Get lots of rest, eat a lot, and avoid stress. I will see you tomorrow. She left. Scott said to me, that’s great news. Who is Dr. Walton? I said, she thought I had an anxiety attack and has had a psychiatrist come see me. He is really nice and easy to talk to. I started telling him I don’t know what to name the twins for their middle names. Hunter has Mom’s middle name Elizabeth and Wyatt has his dad’s middle name. For a moment I couldn’t remember Matthew’s name. I thought, I think I have put his name out of my mind because it is painful to remember. Scott looked at me and said, Matthew. I said, yes. Its just painful to think he is gone. He was such a good man, husband and father. Scott said, I know. Its hard to believe all the bad people in this world that he has taken down and a mountain takes him out. After you have the twins we should have a really nice memorial for him. I agreed. Scott said, I would talk to Mom about middle names. I don’t know if you give all the kids the same middle name? I said, I will. I am sure she will come over today to visit. Breakfast came and we ate and talked. I said, when you go to work will you tell Serena I am sorry I can’t come. He said, sure. They moved her mom in with her yesterday because of a shortage of guards right now, so she is most likely happy about that. I said, I think she will be. Fifteen minutes to 8am Scott got up and said, I have to go. He gave me a big kiss, started playing and singing that song again. He slowly walked toward the door singing the song. When he got out the door he still had his head in finishing the song. I couldn’t help but smile and be happy.

Around 10am Mom and Conner showed up. I was feeling good and was watching Mr. Ed. We had a good visit. I told them that the doctor thought it was anxiety attack and I might go home tomorrow. That I had a psychiatrist to talk to and had to go to the appointments when I leave. We talked about middle names and Mom said she didn’t think you would name the kids with the same middle name but would check on it for me. It was a nice visit. Lunch was really good but a lot. I was keeping things for later. Bananas, fruit cups, rolls and ect. After lunch Dr. Walton came by. We talked about a lot about stress and breathing when I felt stressed.

Scott showed a little after 5pm. He stuck his he in and said, do you have room for one more for dinner? I smiled really big said, yes, especially for you. He started that song again on his phone and was walking to the bed. He stopped his phone. Gave me a big kiss and said, I love playing that song for you because the words are how I feel. I was smiling really big and said, It makes me smile. I am so glad to see you. How was your day? He said, not bad. I read a lot. Not much to do. Serena and her mom are both happy to be together. I told her you couldn’t come and she said, she understood. Carlson is going to have me inspect the building of your new home everyday. So I can tell you how that is going. How was your day. I kind of laughed and said, Oh it was busy. I had to eat a lot and sleep a lot. I will be surprised if I can sleep tonight. He took my hand and kissed it. He said, it was hard being away from you. I just want to kiss you and hug you all day. I said, I know what you mean. I feel the same. We talked a little and then dinner showed up. I told him how they keep bringing me all this food. I kept the cheese and crackers for later. He said, just focus on the protein and everything else will work its way in. We talked and watch the Adams family. I wanted to go home with him. He had said, Carlson had him lock his room and go back to Martha’s place. He said, Carlson said Paul could stay and guard at night. Around 9:30pm I ate some of my left overs which made me sleepy. I told Scott I couldn’t keep my eyes open and he said that was fine. That after I fell asleep he was going home and would come back in the morning. He gave me a good night kiss. Then went and sat in the chair. That is all I remember of today. Over all it was good. I am now another day closer to delivery and feeling good.