Today was just another really good day. When one of the babies cried my breast leaked so I decided to try breast feed again. It went well. I only did it once today but maybe I will do it more tomorrow.
WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 28 Matthew woke me about 4:30am and started making love to me. I came and it was pretty good but I still don’t have those feelings back. Matthew seem to be happy with the fact that he could make me come again. Today was another good day.
THURSDAY FEBRUARY 29 The dog has been staying with us the last could of days. Matthew has been really happy with that because he feels the family is better protected with her there. We went to the gym and had a great time in the hot tub and shower. I am so lucky to have a wonderful husband like Matthew. I will get over this dead head thing I have and learn to have total control so this doesn’t get a hold of me again.
FRIDAY MARCH 1 Mom and I talked about Wyatt’s birthday party tomorrow. Mom ordered a really great bounce house, lunch and cake. Everything look great. Matthew spent a lot of time at work but was with us at meals. Matthew said, he was sorry but he had a lot of unfinished business to take care of. He also said, they added the dog to his six man team. Matthew made my day great and was looking really good. After dinner he had gone in the bathroom and came out without his shirt. He said, it was a little warm. He was looking really good. I couldn’t help but smile at him. The overall day was great.
SATURDAY MARCH 2 Around 10am we went outside for Wyatt’s birthday party. Amy and Cindy had planned games for the kids. A lot of kids came to the party. The kids played games and went in the bounce house until lunch. The kids had a good lunch before breaking open a pinata with candy after lunch. Jean, Serena with their baby and her mom Sarah all came to the party. It was so great to see them and their baby was so beautiful. I was at the table with Mom taking care of the twins when I saw Scott walk up to Matthew who was outside a the bounce house he just put Hunter in. Scott said, may I have a word with your wife? Matthew said, yes. Scott came up to me and said, can we talk. I said, sure. Scott took my hand and lead me around the side of one of the buildings out of site of everyone. Matthew saw Scott leading me off somewhere. Matthew had the jealousy come over him. He said to himself, I am a shaolin priest. Jealousy has no place in my life. He shook it off. With my back again the wall, Scott put one hand on the wall and looked me in the face. I wondered what was up. Scott said, I am moving to the other side to be a trainer and wanted to talk to you first. Are you happy? I responded yes. He said, I think you know I love you and the kids. I would lay my life on the line for you. I said, I know and I want to thankyou for saving my kids. Scott said, well if you ever need anything or you are not happy with Matthew or you just need someone to talk to, I want you to call me. I will always be here for you. I said, thankyou so much. I will never forget you. He said, ok. I just don’t want you to forget me. I said, I could never do that and if I need to see you I will call. He said, please let me know if you are every unhappy with life or Matthew, because I will be there for you? I said, I will. He then said, can I kiss you by? I said, yes. He then gave me a really nice kiss and said, I better take you back. He took my hand and lead me over to the table and I set down. Mom was giving Scott the evil eye because she was not happy with us going out of site. Scott headed off. Mom said to me, do you desire Scott? Jean and Serena froze waiting for my answer. I said, I no, why would you ask that? Mom said, He is a younger man and sometimes I have come in and you were not sleeping with Matthew. I said, that was only because I have been too hot and not feeling well lately. I didn’t want to keep him awake. Mom looked at me with this look of, is she telling the truth. I said, Scott is moving to the other side to train men and just wanted me to know if need anything to call. He just wants to be sure that the kids and I are safe. That was the wrong thing to says because you could tell she was mad. Matthew showed with Hunter and Wyatt. Wyatt wanted more cake and you could tell Matthew didn’t want him to have more, but Mom was staring at Matthew with this, you better not say anything look. So no one said anything. Mom got Wyatt another piece. She sat him on her lap and started feed him cake. She said, this is the boy’s birthday and what he wants is what he gets. Wyatt stuck his hands in the cake and before long he had cake all over himself and mom, but he was happy. Matthew sat down next to me, put his arm around me and gave me a kiss. He was so attentive all day. I think he was worried about what Scott might have said to me. Over all it was another great day.
SUNDAY MARCH 3 Today was just nice. The weather was so nice. Around 80 degrees. We had lunch outside by the pool and the kids with Matthew went in the bounce house that was still there. Matthew didn’t leave my side all day. He kept kissing me and holding my hand. I think having Scott talk to me yesterday was really bothering him. We ate dinner down with everyone else in our group and then went to the family room to play with toys and watch children’s shows. I had a great day but the love feelings are still missing. I don’t know why I still am missing these feeling I had before. I can’t figure out what is wrong, but hope I will get back to normal soon.